almost 110 happy days without you.

day 1: i went to bed with an empty stomach and pretended not to love you

day 3: i cut all the dried flowers i had from the time we went to the public park.

day 7: i read our old messages and tried to kill the monsters under my bed.

day 11: i counted all the reasons to love you, again and went to sleep with a stranger.

day 13: i  met the stranger again at the place that we used to meet, only it was a different corner.

day 19 i wrote you a letter with all our memories. and then fed it to my neighbour’s retriever.

day 23: i painted something that looked like you and burnt the polaroids we took on our first anniversary.

day 47: i wrote myself a poem and met my first grade best friend.

day 63: i accidentally deleted all the songs that we danced to (and made love to)

day 78: i killed all the monsters under my bed and inside my head with the glass pieces left of the whiskey bottle

day 85: i painted galaxies on all the parts of me you touched and fell asleep in a garden of daisies

day 91: i read a poem that spoke to me about our love and tried to breath underwater

day 94:  i dreamt of you leaving again but this time it didnt feel like a nightmare

day 99: i took care of myself and went to bed with a smile.

day 102: i read my mother’s favorite book and the protagonist was just like you. and i understood why mother liked you so much.

day 105: i learnt to dance with the red horned god without stepping on his feet.

day 107: i watched the moon rekindle with his past lovers. And threw the mix tapes you made me.

day 109: i buried all the dead flowers i had collected in my journal, and then planted olives over it.

9 Comments Add yours

  1. Mome says:

    Day 109 makes me cry

    Liked by 2 people

  2. p.s. says:

    One of my favourite things you’ve ever written. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. tee says:

      thankyou so much.


  3. I love love love this post. What a heartbreaking yet beautiful transition through the days after a breakup. There are some days when you just start to feel a LITTLE better, and they feel like the biggest feats. And then there are those terrible, gut wrenching days. Time really does heal

    Liked by 2 people

    1. tee says:

      thankyou so much omg. means a lot. and yes, everything does heal with time. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. aditikapoor says:

    omg, this is absolutely beautiful!
    (Also, most of it gave me major creeps and I became teary eyed, just saying though)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. tee says:

      hahaha ilyy, thankyouu

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Shinitakunai says:

    Keep up your improvement. I must say that you have a very strong will. Not many people can do what you’re doing. I’m so happy for you 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. tee says:

      Hahaha, it was a work of fiction, but thank you very much.


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